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Mr. Potato Head (Liopleurodons Fanon)

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Mr. Potato Head is a potato  who portrays as a TV star. He's loved by all the children in Peppa Pig. He sings "educational" songs in his own "preschool" TV program yet often ends up killing himself somehow. He teaches and brainwashes kids to commit the series of taboo, dangerous and illegal activities such as doing drugs, committing crimes, committing suicides, killing people, swearing, dangerous stunts, etc, often resulting in violent acts.

List of songs sung by Mr. Potato Head

Bathtime Song

"Make sure you clean your balls!"

"Make sure you clean them good!"

"You don't want smelly balls!"

"Cause then girls won't like you!"

"Make sure you do cocaine, kids!" (Hillbilly-Styled Laugh)

(Knocks hairdryer into tub, electrocuting him)

Static message: DO NOT LISTEN TO ANYTHING DOOFY TOLD YOU! DRUGS ARE VERY BAD AND DO NOT EVER PUT ANY KIND OF ELECTRICAL DEVICE IN THE BATHTUB! IT WILL KILL YOU!

Farm Animals Song

"Old McDonald had a farm!"

"E.I.E.I.O.!"

"And on his farm he had a bunny!"

"E.I.E.I.O.!"

"And that bunny pissed me off so I'll stab it in the face! Die bunny! Die bunny! Die bunny!"

(The blood from the bunny covers the camera lens, leaving the rest of the lyrics unheard)

Shoe Tying Song

"When you want to learn how to tie your shoes!"

"Doofy can teach you what to do!"

"First you gotta grab one shoe lace!"

"Then you gotta grab the other one!"

"Then you give up 'cause it's too fucking hard!"

(Too fucking hard)

"Then you grab a noose and kill yourself!"

(Kill yourself)

Muffin Man Song

"Do you know the Muffin Man? The Muffin Man, The Muffin Man!"

"Do you know the Muffin Man? 'Cause the asshole owes me money!"

"Have you seen the Muffin Man? The Muffin Man, The Muffin Man!"

"Have you seen the Muffin Man? 'Cause if you do I'm gonna get my money!"

"I'm gonna shoot 'em! I'm gonna kill 'em! I'm gonna shoot 'em! Shoot 'em! Shoot 'em!"

"You know what, stop the damn music! Stop it!"

"Muffin Man if you're listening, I'm coming for your ass! I'm coming! I'm packing too!"

(Shoots self)

Evicted Song

"I didn't pay my bills! I didn't pay my bills!"

"I'm getting evicted 'cause I didn't pay my bills!"

"My wife is leaving me! My wife is leaving me!"

"I'm gonna kill myself 'cause my wife is leaving me!"

(Hillbilly-styled laugh)

"Remember kids: Woman will leave you if you lose everything!"

(Shoots self)

Drug Song

"Twinkle Twinkle Little Star!"

"I Have Drugs Inside My Car!"

"If The Cops Show Up I'm F**cked!"

"I Might As Well give myself up!"

"Oh Sh**! That's The Cops! I Better Run!"

"I'm Gonna Kill Myself With This Gun!"

(Shoots Self)

Easter Song

"The Easter Bunny Didn't Give Me Candy!"

"So I'm Gonna Shoot Him In The Face!"

"He's Gonna Bleed Everywhere!"

"And Hopefully Doesn't Stain The Carpet!" 

"Oh Hey Easter Bunny Little Son Of A B**tch! You Enjoying That Carrot Huh? Let's Add Some Lead To It!"

(Shoots The Easter Bunny)

"DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE!"

Electrocuting Song

"My Wife Left Me!"

"She Took My Kids!"

"I Hate My Life And I Don't Wanna Live!"

"So I'm Gonna Put a Fork in The Electric Socket!"

(Gets Electrocuted)

Potato O's Song

"You'll Need To Eat A Bowl Of Potato O's!"

"You Could Win A Trip To Disney World!"

"All You Gotta Do Is Find The Knife!"

"And Then You Need To Kill My Ex-Wife!"

(Explains Contest to Viewers, Then Shoots Himself With A Gun).

Baseball Song

"Take Me Out To The Ball Game!"

"Take Me Out With The Crowd!"

"Just Hit Me Harder And Crack My Head!"

"I Do Not Care If I End Up Death!"

"Ow Ow Ow!"

My Husband

"Hi Kids, You're Probably Wondering Why I Divorced Doofy. Well Here's Why."

"My Old Husband Cheated On Me Then He Had A Gambling Problem."

"He Liked To Drink And Do Cocaine Then He'd Hit Me In The Face."

He Cheated On Me Here, He Cheated On Me There, He Just Cheated And Cheated Everywhere All The Time."

Likes and Dislikes

Likes

  • Killing everyone and even himself
  • Crimes
  • Entertaining and teaching kids
  • His TV career
  • Money
  • Illegal activates
  • Doing dangerous and deadly stunts
  • Drugs
  • Killing bunnies
  • Guns

Dislikes

  • His ex-wife
  • Bunnies
  • Police
  • Laws

Trivia

  • Despite being a kids show Mr. Potato swears, and the series is quite dark due to several evil aspects. This includes telling kids to do drugs and illegal things, threatening to kill the Muffin Man, poisoning himself, hanging himself over tying his shoes being "too fucking hard."
    • He has sung parodies of the nursery rhymes: Old MacDonald, Muffin Man, The Farmer in the Dell and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star as well as three original songs: Bathtime, Tie Your Shoes and Die Easter Bunny.
    • He seems to make mountains out of molehills, for example, he gets an assault rifle and shoots at a toothbrush and a tube of toothpaste because he has no teeth, strangles himself because he cannot tie his shoes, and also might have some sort of anger problem, as shown in the Old MacDonald song, a rabbit just comes out of nowhere and he gets pissed and stabs it. He can also be seen as a pessimist, and he gets the blood all over the whole screen.

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